Family

John 13:34-35

English Standard Version (ESV)

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

 

The more I pray, read my Bible, go to church, and center my life on Christ, the closer I feel to him.  Some days, I feel like I'm making so much progress in my faith walk that God is practically shining through everything that I say and do.  Then, they come along and ruin it all. I can be feeling perfectly kind all day, but when I have to be kind to them, I completely regress back to my mean and selfish ways.  I'm sure many of you can relate; after all, no one can really get under our skin in the same way they can.

 

If you already guessed that when I'm referring to "they," I'm referring to our families, you have guessed correctly. In the book, When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy, Eric Ludy explains that, although our family has the power to drive us up a wall, they are the perfect training ground for marriage. Well, I'd like to take this concept one step further and declare that family is not only the training ground for future romantic relationships, but for all human interactions we will face throughout our lifetime.

 

Hear me out here for a moment. Most people have probably lived with somebody, whether it is a sibling, parent, grandparent, friend, or guardian, who truly cares for them. Most people have probably hated living with that person at some point, even if only for a moment. Most people probably have, unfortunately, done or said something hurtful to this person in a moment of weakness that shouldn't have been done or said.

 

This picture below shows how you were probably feeling when you did or said whatever it is that hurt the person.

 

 

The picture is funny, but it's also true in some regards. The people closest to us can be the people who can best drive us insane. Inconveniently, however, God commands us to have a forgiving, unconditional love for strangers and family members alike and actually display that love on a regular bases. This can be so hard. Nonetheless, if we cannot even show kindness for those closest to us, how can we expect to show unconditional love for total strangers who come and go throughout our lives?

 

As I stated earlier, family is the training ground for future relationships. Once we master loving and respecting our family members, being kind to everyone else is a breeze. The habits we put into place concerning how we treat our family will follow us in our future friendships, marriages, and acquaintanceships. Eric Ludy, the author mentioned earlier, had a pastor who once said, "You are only as holy as you are in your home." Thus, if we want to be like Christ and have healthy, loving relationships now and forever, we have to start practicing at home.

 

Although I have been writing in generalizations throughout this passage, I understand that some of you may not have the typical family environment that others are blessed with. Perhaps you come from a broken home with silenced hurts and a family that is less than supportive. Even in that situation, however, you can use "family" as a training ground. Pray for your parents or siblings, even if they say or do hurtful things. Pray for God to grant you the forgiveness you need to make amends with past pains and move forward. I'm not pretending it will be easy; trust me; I know from experience that it can be hard, but it's worth it.

 

When you accept the family that God has given you, and embrace the lessons that they teach you, you will be able to maintain healthier relationships in the future and obey God's command to love one another.  Even if they aren't blood related to you, your family is there to love and support you; we should cherish them, rather than get annoyed or frustrated with them. When you get discouraged, go to Him for help, and allow His spirit to work through you.

 

"May He equip you with all you need for doing His will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to Him. All glory to Him forever and ever! Amen." -Hebrews 13:21

 

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